Work Horror Stories

[Elegance]

So @Eros and I are talking about some pretty awful/weird work memories. I'll post a few of mine, I look forward to hearing yours!

Elegance's Staples Stories​

The Horrors of Retail Shoppers

Spoiler: Typewriter Paper?

So this elderly man walks in and says, "Do you have typewriter paper?" So, I assume he means the cleaning sheets (since they take multipurpose paper, which should be common knowledge), and I inform him that we do not carry it in the store and that I can help him order it online. He starts yelling (and I mean yelling) about how technology is moving too fast and he's all for it but not when it replaces stuff like "good ol' reliable typewriters" where you can't even find paper anymore. Well, my supervisor comes over, and he gives her the same spiel, but this time, he says he wants to TYPE SOMETHING OUT. So she hands him multipurpose paper and he's like, "SEE??? You DO have typewriter paper!" I just smile and ring him out and apologize for not knowing what typewriter paper was.

Spoiler: "I drove all this way?"

I was about to punch out for the day when this lady catches me and says, "Will you help me find this paper?" which is a relatively easy task since she knew exactly what brand/type/size paper she wanted. So, I walk her on over to the paper aisle, find the spot where it should be, scan it, and it shows we have 7 in the store. I look for them, and deduce they must be on the truck that has yet to be unloaded. I politely give her the spiel, "I'm sorry that we don't have this paper in stock today, but I'd be happy to order it from our warehouse and have it shipped free-of-charge to your workplace or home!" She was shocked that this obscure paper (that we only carry a select few of at a time) was not in stock- "You mean you're telling me that I drove ALL THE WAY HERE to get this paper and you don't have it??" By this point I was 10 minutes late clocking out so I just said, "Yep." To which she responds "Well this is my 3rd time to this store and I must say I am not impressed." So, I respond with the scripted "I'm sorry about that, I can get my manager and she can help you further." But no. She expected the paper to magically appear from the copy center (which was NOT the location of the paper might I add, but this lady "knew everything"). My manager ended up just giving her a ream to get her out. I promptly clocked out and left.

Spoiler: "You Owe Me $2"

It's closing time. My register is the last one open. This "crazy coupon lady" tries to "stack" coupons (not allowed). Well, my manager just said to override it to get her out. The items were already on sale, so when she used the coupons for the free regular priced item, it took it to "negative $2". I hand her the receipt for the free purchase that wasn't technically allowed and wish her a good night. NOPE! "Where's my $2??" "Ma'am, the coupon has no cash value-" "BUT IT'S -$2.00!!" By this point, my manager was ready to take my drawer. I explain the situation and he proceeds to open the drawer, pulls out $2, slam the drawer shut, and hands her the money and says "Get. Out." just so we can close the store.

The Fun of the Job

Spoiler: "Crabmeat"

This is the Legend of Crabmeat the Magical Bowling Ball, the store mascot.

After a long day of work, the store took a bowling trip. The General Manager was using this red ball with "Crabmeat" engraved on it. He was bowling unusually well, so he deemed it magic. He was so attached to this bowling ball that he was trying to figure out how to take it home. Well, another employee asked to purchase the ball. The owner said, "Well, it was left here and nobody has ever come back for it. You can just take it."

The GM was so happy he cried and held the Bowling Ball like it was his child. To this day, Crabmeat the Magical Bowling Ball is in the store office watching over us.

Spoiler: "How to Stop a Burglar"

Step 1: Notify the Police.
Step 2: Tell the burglar that the police are on their way.
Step 3: Another employee, pretending to be on the burglar's side so no harm comes to them, says there's a perfect hiding place in the back.
Step 4: Lead the burglar to the back and assist them in getting into the baler.
Step 5: Close the baler door and wait for the police. Crisis averted!

Spoiler: "Black Friday"

1. A group of young boys sat outside all night waiting to go in and get the XBOX 360 when it was new. The other shoppers waiting for the doors to open talked to them about it, thought it was nice how dedicated they were. Finally, somebody had the heart to tell the kids that Staples doesn't sell the XBOX 360. The others waiting in line had a good laugh, the boys looking for a good deal? Not so much.
2. Awesome Speaker System + Dogs Barking Jingle Bells + Long Lines = Annoyed Customers and satisfied employees.

 

[Ang]

Spoiler: The case of Barbra Streisand v. Plant

When your boss looks like Barbra Stresiand:

Spoiler: kinda like this

her singing voice sounds like this though:

Spoiler: her voice

And she decides to talk to the plants on her desk daily... And sing to them at least a few times a week...

 

[Cowboy_Pirate]

The IT Conundrum:
"Ma'am my computer wont start! It's plugged in to a working plug and I'm pressing the button but nothing is happening"
Walks across the building; doesn't have the on/off switch turned on...
PLOT TWIST: its my bosses computer (who's a total JERK) and he asks me why it worked for me and not him so I made up some random story about how his processor wasn't communicating... lol

 

[Moogle]

Okay this sounds like fun, and boy do I have a few:

Spoiler: The Swimming Pool

It was a normal afternoon shift, nothing crazy was happening until I got this phone call. "Good Afternoon ******* Golf Course, how can I help you?" "Yes Hi, I'm looking for a swimming pool, do you have one? "I'm sorry Ma'am but we are a golf course, no swimming pool here." "That's crazy I was told you have a swimming pool, why are you hiding it from me!" Now I'm trying to be as calm as I can, "Ma'am I am truly sorry but we do not nor have we ever had a swimming pool on the premises, you may be thinking of a different golf course. "No I am not!" and at that point she hung up and never called back.

Spoiler: The Lady in Jeans

So since I work at a golf course, we have a dress code that all need to adhere to. Jeans are in no way allowed. One Friday morning mid fall a lady and her friend came in asking to play a round. No problem so I began to ring her up when my boss noticed she was wearing jeans. He politely told her that they are not allowed on the course. Something went off with this woman and she started screaming and cursing at us, like it was our fault. She slammed the door and left the building only to return a few minutes later to yell at us some more about how we are ruining her week and that she will get a lawyer due to the harassment given to her. We were in the right and she was in the wrong. We don't make the rules we only enforce them. It almost got to the point where the police were going to be needed. Thankfully she left and never came back. All of this for a pair of jeans...really!

Those are just a couple of stories. I work three different jobs and while I'd love to post stories about the other ones I can't. They have said that working with the public is hard, but I never really knew how hard until I started working a seasonal/retail type job.
+1 for Crazy People! ​

 

[Cloudyblue]

I work as a staff at my university. We set up events and work during them, such as basket ball, field hockey, commencements, etc. I love the basketball events, mostly the women's because setting up is easier (less chairs to put down). Recently, I have been doing commencements. I worked my first one a few weeks ago. This girl and I were going to do the front door telling people where to go and that we had to close and not let anyone in during a certain time. The girl that I was working with I'm scared of because she would get so angry with me if I were to mess up on anything such as, field hockey of 2015, she kept yelling at me o-o So, I tried to act like I knew what I was doing. Eventually we had to close the doors, so me quickly put up the curtains (they were not long about 3 feet tall maybe. People got so worried that we would miss the graduation (we had a tv for them to watch till the graduates went in the doors then we would let them in. People we still getting scared, so my boss was trying to tell them that they can come in soon. Everyone was shushing each other to hear her. Then everyone was quiet to hear what she had to say and it was cool to me that she was able to get everyone to calm down.

Another story:
I was doing commencements handing books out to people entering the arena. I had to hand it to them so fast because they were so many people coming in all at once. This one guy said to me "No thank you. I don't want to kill the trees" that didn't make any sense to me since the tree was already cut down and made into a book. Other than that a lot of people wanted the books, but a lot of the books ended up being put back or not taken with them after the commencement.

 

[Elegance]

Oh man. I just CAN'T with this next story.

Spoiler: "Call the Driver"

Okay, for those of you who don't know, at Staples, the Copy & Print Center can get you practically anything you want. However, most of that has to be fulfilled online and shipped to the store for pickup. This is what this customer had done about 3 days ago.

Now, it's 9:00am EST and the store had just opened. I was in the back half of aisle 2 replacing tags when I heard the following conversation: (E is employee, C is customer)
C: "Where is my order??"
E: It will be here by 10:00, the package is on the UPS truck and it makes its stop between 9:30 and 10 depending on traffic. We can call you when it gets here if you'd like.
C: "My husband has a meeting with his supervisor for a major promotion at 10! I need this NOW!! I am very unhappy."

At this point, my sarcastic self calls over the radio, Well yelling at you won't make the shipment get here faster.

The manager is called over to the copy center.
M: How can I help? Would you like us to try to print the bulk order ourselves at no additional cost?
C: "Absolutely not! You'll never get it done. I WANT YOU TO CALL THE UPS DRIVER AND TELL THEM TO DELIVER IT HERE RIGHT NOW.

At this point, I'm practically suffocating myself because I had to hold back my laughter. Can this lady be serious?? Who does she think she is???, I call over the radio again.

Now get this: The manager picks up the phone. CALLS UPS CUSTOMER SERVICE. And the operator says..........

Spoiler

"We can't call the truck driver and reroute them."

WELL this crazy person didn't like that answer. So she goes off saying how she just knows that they can do that and my manager is lying to her. She angrily storms out the door with her husband and drives away.

Now, I don't know if you believe in karma, but let me tell you, this lady had been gone no less than 3 minutes and UPS delivered her package. So my manager contacts her, she picks it up, REFUSES to take it for free, but accepts 20% off for the "late delivery", and acts so grateful.

I hope she never comes in again. I found myself asking myself and seriously considering if this is how I wanted to be fired. I was so close to just going off on this lady for attacking my coworkers about something that is so CLEARLY out of their control and still are trying to do what they can to satisfy her.

 

[AristoKena]

So, I have to post this one since it was my first bad experience with a customer and it honestly scared me so bad lmao

I worked at a theater as a concessionist. Now, obviously washing your hands is a rule. One I'm very good at since I'm handling peoples food and drinks. One time I had this lady come in here, with her refillable cup. (we sold these at the beginning of the year for $6 and for the rest of the year you could get soda in the cup for $2.50) and I no lie had her yell at me in front of my boss and other customers, because I grabbed her cup wrong. My finger was inside the cup, just out of habit (just like at the top rim of it not the whole way down, maybe just a fourth of my finger was in there). I'm clumsy so I never just like to grip it with one hand, and I always just used my finger to balance it. She yelled at me because of how unclean it was and wouldn't accept my offer of cleaning the cup even though I had legit just washed my hands five minutes before she had came up.

I was so mortified x.x

 

[Flurp]

Someone took a ******** on the set during a show I was doing once.

 

[Zelena]

At my job we don't have filtered water other than our mega hot water so we don't give complimentary cups of water. Well this girl did not like that one bit so when my coworker and i told her she can buy a bottle of water for $1.50 she said, "you know what's about to happen to your register if I don't get some water right?" So I went to go call mall security and the next thing I know she basically Hulk punched our register and it smashes everywhere. Then she runs away yelling and laughing, "try to catch me"

Also one day like a month into my job I was just ringing up a customer and I see a girl walk past me with no pants. Her butt was just showing and I have no idea if security caught her or not.

 

[gravebound]

im just about to start working at cvs as a cashier, i'm both scared and excited to add to this thread

 

[pirateguitarchick]

i worked at a horrible restaurant.
the newer manger we got was a complete butt head (nicest way to describe him).
everything had to be up to his standards, which was normally extreme.
he kept moving around the waiting area benches in the from the entrance to different parts of the restaurant.
i didn't think much about it until...where he put it.
it stuck out like a sore thumb, and walking towards very bright windows, you couldn't see anything below you.
i had never tripped and fallen so hard before like that in my life!
what probably made it worse was that some kid saw me and i tried to play it off like it was NBD.
only one other worker saw me and asked if i was okay. i was more embarrassed than anything though.
it was mentioned to this manager and he said, "oh, well, i hope you learned your lesson."
oh, i sure did...

 

[NancyD]

I work at a juice bar, have been for 2 years, and I do have some funny stores but I'll share a sad one with you guys because I still think about it to this day. I actually have two!

#1:
So theres this girl at my work, super gorgeous and REALLY skinny and she's pretty tall, about 5'8. I'm actually 6'1, and ever since I was really young I've ALWAYS wanted to be a model, but I've never been pretty or skinny enough. So I'm on register and this lady comes in and orders a health nut with almond butter (besides the point) and starts talking to my coworker while she's working and says 'You better tell me that you model!' and I'm just standing there, completely dumbfounded that this is happening to me right now. I guess I should also add that I have some severe self-confidence issues--I have been eating healthy and exercising for months upon months now but I still feel disgusting. I hate my picture being taken because I hate the way I look, pretty stupid since I've always dreamed of being a model. Back to the story, she just keeps going on about how she should model and said 'Trust me I'm in the business, you should contact an agency... etc' This lady didn't even look at me, but of course why would she because I'm too fat and ugly to be a model anyway. I'm on register, and I start tearing up, it's REALLY bad. I get done with register and I run to the back of the store and start BAWLING my eyes out. I don't think I had ever cried that much. It was so bad, I got sent home early. The worst part is that the lady comes in a lot now and always comments something to the girl I work with, and she doesn't even know how disgusting and awful it makes me feel every single time. I'm the type of girl that you ask 'Do you play volleyball?' instead of 'Do you model?' because the second question would be stupid to ask because of my appearance.
#2:
This one is way shorter. This guy Ian used to come in all the time and get a juice with everything in it, like a couple times a week at least. My coworkers and I just found out that he killed himself last week. We never even would of suspected that he was sick because he acted so different and happy with us. We went to his memorial service the day we found out. I wish I would of gotten to know him better

Sorry for the sad stories guys! but my life is sad